Palaverings of the Lusional Birdcat

Dear Citizens of America

2012-02-03T19:24:00.000-05:00

I beseach you not to vote for Mitt Romney. Please, please, please do not vote for this charlatan.

Why? I shall explain.

I live in Massachusetts, where this man NEVER should have been elected as Governor. I do not know how he was even on the ballot here. He was NEVER a citizen of the state of Massachusetts and therefor NEVER should have been allowed to run for the position. He is a disingenuous prig of a man with no sense of right and wrong. He is a spoiled rich-boy who knows nothing of day to day struggles of the normal American. He does not understand nor is he willing to understand minorities, women, poor, middle-class nor anything or anyone relating to anything at all that does not have huge dollar signs behind it. Mr. Romney's idea of middle-class is someone who earns more than $250,000.00 a year. Not realistic at all.

While Mr. Romney was Governor of Massachusetts, one of his policies, which he widely touts as an accomplishment, is health care reform. This is a lie. Mr. Romney DID NOT reform health care in the state of Massachusetts. What he did do was require all citizens of Massachusetts to purchase health care. Completely Unconstitutional. Let me tell you about my attempts to purchase this supposed affordable health care.

I am a disabled person and while I was attempting to obtain SSDI as I could not work full time and was struggling to work part time, I applied for Mr. Romney's 'new' health care program through the state's MassHealth. Here is what Mr. Romney deems as affordable. I earned, before taxes, the sum of $600.00 per month. For me to purchase health care through Mr. Romney's program would cost me $450.00 per month. Now, how exactly, is a person supposed to live on the difference?

That is not health care reform.

For your information, most of the state of Massachusetts citizens who were uninsured before Mr. Romney are still uninsured after Mr. Romney.

Mr. Romney is a fraud. A liar. A cheat. A bigot. A charlatan.

Do not vote for Mr. Romney.

2011-12-02T15:19:00.001-05:00

OH NO!

SLPNoSeventeen - Where we have to admit...

2011-06-28T20:21:00.000-04:00

That if you see protesters wearing gas masks, helmets and body padding, you have to realise they mean business. Did you watch the coverage of the Greek riots? This was one planned protest! I don't think I've ever seen a riot where those who were rioting actually had more protective gear then the police!

RabidReader news now...

I've update the runboard, removing some forums and adding an original publishers forum.

I am so thrilled that Veritas03 has posted 'Paws of Furry' at RabidReader. It's a very wonderful and entertaining fanfic!

I would like to draw attention to the original fiction of LEmentz. If you've not checked out 'The Shepherd' trilogy, you should. LEmentz has posted the first book, 'The Shepherd' and is in the process of posting the second book, 'The Protector'. The third, I've been told, is written and in the process of editing and will be posted following the second book.

I am also enjoying reading Shadesmacleans tradewinds!

SLPNoSixteen - Where we 'Help' those of us who were hoping for the Wrath of God

2011-05-22T15:55:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was a complete bust, wasn't it? Were you hoping for a few kick-arse months of the 'Wrath of God' type? Were you hoping to be rid of all those christian zealots and their yahoo sycophants? Are you feeling blue and out of sorts and just a bit more than let down? Well, pull up a chair, peacach, and commiserate with me. There's comfort in numbers, after all. And while all those poor unraptured dunderheads who can't think for themselves are sure to turn to their canonical harbingers for help coping with the rapture that wasn't, we, the unwrathed, can only turn to ourselves.

What we need to remember is without the yahoos who can we point and laugh at? We need the christian right to keep us entertained and make us scratch our heads in wonder at the marvel that is stupidity. There is not another single assemblage of people in the entire world that can take a simple ideology and so pervert it as to believe that they are actually speaking or doing 'God's' Will. If it were not for the faithful, our lives would become boring. Really. We'd have no clear target for our ire. We'd have no one to snicker at if it weren't for the churl standing at the downtown crossing holding a sign that says 'The end is near, repent!' Who would come up with the next 'End of Days?' Who would make us feel good about ourselves and our own state of sanity and intelligence if all of the unraptured were to disappear?

That alone is worth keeping a few around.

So, my friends, I say this to you...

Don't fret the rapture that wasn't. Think about those poor sods that truly believed that they were going to be 'saved' yesterday. Stop for a moment and wonder at how that sad group that gathered in the middle of the street at ten-to-six yesterday evening, arms raised in gratitude, faces glowing in pious anticipation, hearts full of hope and wonder waiting only to have their dreams of felicity crushed at ten-past. Imagine the utter and complete despondency that these apostles of doomsday must be experiencing today.

When you think of this and how it makes you feel, then I want you to get up and walk out your front door and seek out your christian neighbor. Yes, my friend, find the nearest dogmatist. I say to you, go forth and seek thee out one of the doleful unraptured, now sitting in the gutter weeping in utter despair and tell them...

Póg mo thóin! (kiss my arse)

SLPNoFifteen-AKS isn't a word

2011-04-04T19:20:00.000-04:00

DAMMIT! Don't say that anymore! It's ASK A>SSSSS>CK! Not A>CK>SSSS! I don't care your race, creed, religion, sexual orientation.... AKS isn't a fecking word! People who say 'aks' sound like complete idiots. DO YOU WISH TO BE AN IDIOT!?! I thought not. Don't say it anymore. Also mines isn't a word either and you sound like a complete dunderhead when you say 'I aks mines.'

Rant complete.

Excepting, that irregardless isn't a word either, neanderthal!

SLPNoFourteen - What is up with that?!?!

2011-03-21T19:34:00.000-04:00

What is up with that?! What you ask? Well, I'll tell you. What is up with all this basketball nonsense!?! Have I told you I absolutely dislike basketball? I do, so there! I can't stand all the whistles and stopping and watching some dingbat, spoiled, can't spell their own name, 'player,' shoot from the free throw line every five minutes. What happen to manning up? What happen to the fecking cheep shot. Gods, I miss the cheep shot. Can't we all just play the fecking game without all the whining and complaining. "OOOOO , that boy touched my elbow!" FOUL! Good gracious, MAN UP!

Don't even ask me about American Football! What a load of pussies! All that padding and they still whine about this that and the other. They should all be forced to play Irish rules rugby! That is, after all, what American football is based on. American Footballers would never survive.

Professional sport has ruined the entertainment value of sport in general.

That's my rant tonight. I hate March Madness, I hate Playoffs, I hate football season. So there!

SLPNoThirteenzies - Where I hate Lady Ga Ga like I hated Madona in the eighties

2011-03-08T19:40:00.000-05:00

Good gracious, people have gone from appreciating good music to following about like sheep! I miss the grunge days. I truly do. Ninety percent of what is played today is total and complete crap. Yes, crap. That which you shit out your anus. I blame Lady Ga Ga, The Back Street Boys and Country Music in general. But I could be prejudice, I really, really hate country music. And perhaps it's my youth that makes me nostalgic for what I consider 'good' music. I cut my teeth on punk and grundge and alternative. I miss those days. Radio blaring and screeching at the top of my lungs to the Sex Pistols, Nirvana, DGenX and my absolute hero Trent Fucking Reznor, who one an academy award recently. *sobs* I'm not quite sure how I feel about that. While I think he's brilliant and his music has helped me cope in many ways with many of life's less than happy moments. What does it mean when your angst hero gets such a legitimate honor. It's a bit disturbing. The author of 'I wanna fuck you like an animal' wins an Oscar for a score of a movie I find boring, and I must note here, I strongly disdain facebook. As a matter of fact I hate it. ALMOST as much as I hate Lady Ga Ga and the Back Street Boys.

That's my rant tonight. If we, those who hate following about like sheep, could just manage to get all those who do like to follow about like sheep, to believe with absolute certainty that Lady Ga Ga causes brain damage, then I believe the world would be a better place.

SLPNoTwelve - Where I have a bone to pic - HON

2011-03-03T19:28:00.000-05:00

Don't you just hate it when people who don't really know you call you 'hon.'

I've noticed that allot of online posters, who think they are 'friends' with anonymous, only know you as your online name, call each other 'hon.' It's disturbing and condescending and really, really irritating. It's like the dude you met three seconds ago in the chat room calling you 'babe,' it's creepy!

THAT'S IT! It's down right creepy! Who calls anyone 'hon!' It's weird and you should all just STOP!

I get the shivers whenever I get a review for a fanfic I've writtern from someone I've know casually on line and they say some crap like "'hon,' I blah blah bla..." I'm like WTF!? It completely changes my opinion of the poster. Why would you use a term of supposed endearment to address, basically a complete stranger?! It's not polite and down right - what was that word again... CREEPY!

Well, that's my rant today. See ya later, hon, babe, sweetie, honey-pie, my little mushoogoomas.

SLPNoElevensies - Where Rabid Reader undergoes a redesign...

2011-03-01T20:39:00.000-05:00

I have updated my website with a new look. Much cleaner and eliminates that nasty menu floaty thing that happened in Internet Explorer.

Now! I shall rant! About! Internet Explorer!

WTF IS UP WITH THAT LOT! There are internet standards, you know, Mister Gates! Why can't you lot just use the normal standard that everyone else is using. Do you realise that I spent the better part of a day trying to figure out why something wasn't working on my website in IE, only to discover it was a space. Literally, a space. All other browsers didn't need that one tiny space betwixt a bracket and a layout element, but IE did!

YOU SUCK, IE! YOU TOTALLY SUCK PIG KNOBS! Yes, you do! Great, big, muddy, sloppy, moldy pig knobs.

Starry has bunny ears.

SLPNoTen - Where the Catbird is really a Pterodactyl...

2011-02-07T14:37:00.000-05:00

...and has absolutely no feathers at all. In an unfortunate, or fortunate, as the case may be, turn of events, the Catbird has admitted to being a close decedent of a Pterodactyl. Pterodactyls, as we all know, have absolutely no feathers, nor do they have fur. I believe that this admission proves that Starry F. Birdcat is, in reality, a non-lusional reptile of some indeterminate sort and that she has been impersonating a warm blooded creature. Her feathers and fur are actually glued on using an unusual mixture of Nair, tar, udder balm and bunny excrement.

All Birdcats and owls should be wary of Starry F. Lizardrat nee Birdcat and should not believe anything she says, excepting of course opposite days which fall on the third Thursday of a month containing an 'r' in it. On those days we can believe half of what she says but not half of what she wants to say.

Also one should be aware that blogthings has determined that Starry is also an Oompa Loompa. This would explain the orange glow which has been emanating beneath her haphazardly cleaved on fur and feathers.

SLPNoNine - Where we think my acronym sound out like slap me

2011-02-01T20:35:00.000-05:00

Things to do...

Eliminate all catbirds, aka starry
Spank shadow the filter fool
Talk moonie into moving to Boston
Move to Australia (because moonie has moved to Boston)
Find Catopia
Seek all t'youna without penis
Gather all shiny things
prevent starry from ever touching shiny things
Find Beavis and kidnap him
Find Micah and eliminate him
Learn French and Italian
Learn to play mandolin
Teach Jasper to fetch my slippers
Stalk Raven on Twitter
Find the elusive Custard Dragon

SLPNoEight - Where the birdcat can't play and pouts profusely

2011-01-31T19:30:00.000-05:00

I received my mandolin today and managed to tune it, however I have yet to receive my instructional guides and therefor can do squat all with it. Clabby is a verily unhappily birdcat. I am sure the catbird will gloat mightily and inform me that she is an expert mandolin player, at which point I shall sick Jasper upon her scraggly feathered arse. I am sure there will be tweezers and Nair involved, so not for the faint of heart.

SLPNoSeven, where we continue declaring starry a catbird

2011-01-27T19:26:00.000-05:00

She is and her feathers have never been the same since The Shadow doused her in Nair hair removal products.

In more important news..

I have ordered a mandolin! I have! I didn't spend allot of money cause I might suck at it. But I am hoping it is not too much different from guitar. I am also hoping to be proficient enough on it by Christmas to play a few Christmas carols.

SLPNoSix - Where we unsatisfyingly satisfy the completely unsatiable

2011-01-25T09:11:00.000-05:00

Have you ever had a feeling like you were being prodded in a direction that you know you shouldn't go in? Or have you ever felt that you are being subliminally influenced by aliens from another planet? Have you ever used a flowbee? If you've used a flowbee contact starrytrekchic at runboard. She's looking for testimonials of the non-lusional sort.

I have decided to learn how to play the mandolin. I just don't know which one to choose. I am also wondering if restringing a mandolin is similar to a guitar, cause I'm pretty sure I will need to do that right quick.

My attempt at making a Hedwig Owl was a failure as the instructions were complete bollocks. I am going to 'wing' it (snickers to self) and try making it up as I go along. I've never done that before so it might come out looking like a catbird.

Sacred lusional post number five, where we declare starry a catbird of the non-lusional sort

2011-01-17T16:04:00.000-05:00

I think the title says it all.

In other news...

Over at the Rabid Reader, LEmentz is creating artwork for her original fiction trilogy, Shepherd, the first in three parts is complete and she shall be posting the second part soon. I hope to have the artwork up for a banner. I admit I am curious as to what the three main characters look like. So expect the new skin there soon.

Following that...

There is a flying catbird randomly making accusations of the non-lusional sort. I expect that has something to do with her wings being too tight and her tail not so fluffy.

Sacred lusional post number four, where I consider my next project...

2011-01-15T13:18:00.000-05:00

Since the moon hath forsaken me, and my silver yarn is on back-order, I am considering making a Hedwig owl. I saw the crochet pattern and instantly wanted to work on it. In case you haven't guessed already, I love owls and all things Harry Potter. Oh, and also penguins. However, I haven't found a penguin project that has appealed to me.

I shall post a picture if I do make a Hedwig.

Sacred lusional post number three, where the moon is missing

2011-01-13T20:18:00.000-05:00

She is! I think it has summat to do with those new astrological signs where I went from Taurus to Aries. Evidently I'm a real go-getter. *snorts in amusement* Though, I must say, I am clearly moody, impatient, impulsive and short-tempered, though not self-involved. I tend to put everyone before myself. I suppose that's better than being selfish and stubborn, but I was used to that.

I wonder if this means I have to completely change my personality?! I hope not. I've gotten used to me the way I am!

Anywho, I really like this new sign, Ophiuchus, and wishes I was born at the end of November. Imagine, interpreter of dreams and healing powers, luck and blessings!! WTF! I was clearly born at the wrong time of year and curse my parents frisky July's.

Well, if the moon shows up sometime soon, I will be most happy, especially if she's full and all. :shifty: I shan't hold my breath though. The moon, as we all know, is busy over at facebook, keeping track of a starry's treck and a Canadian.

Sacred lusional post number two, where we have an owl...

2011-01-12T14:49:00.000-05:00

I crocheted this today. The instructions were WAY off making it rather a pain in the arse, but I managed to create this lopsided owl.

Birdcats have an affinity for owls, you know.

Sacred lusional post number one

2011-01-11T16:14:00.000-05:00

'Kay so, here's the deal. I'm gonna post here with what ever rant I want, and I'll post any updates to TheRabidReader.com. Not that I'm expecting anyone non-lusional to read this. We all know only lusional Birdcats can actually read, let alone write. Though non-lusional Birdcats have been known to type.

Of course, there is always the lusional Catbird, a very rare species, that can both read and type. I only know of one of those. Thinks it's a Birdcat, but I mean really, she's got feathers only on her wings. Silly Catbird. But she can both read and type, whether she can actually write though, that is in question.